I Don't Deserve This!

 There are a lot of times in life that we all feel like we don't deserve something, many times this feeling stems from a sense of entitlement. Usually we say we don't deserve to be treated a certain way or we say it as a way to infer that we deserve more than what we have received. I am just as guilty of this as anyone else, I feel like for some reason I am different than other people and that I shouldn't have to endure someone being less than polite. The truth is no one should be rude, mean, hurtful, inconsiderate of others but the reality is we all act this way at times. We all have bad days; we all react without thinking our actions through sometimes; we all make assumptions. Worst of all we all feel we are entitled to days where our behavior is poor but we also feel entitled to never have to experience the repercussions of someone else having that same poor behavior.

We all need to learn to love each other in the way that Christ loves us. I know that the WWJD fad made the question a bad secular joke rather than a true question to keep ourselves in check. I really do think about this a lot when I am struggling what to do in a situation or when I know the actions I want to take are wrong. I honestly ask myself, what would Jesus do, I mean if He was really here in my shoes what would His response be? It doesn't make me perfect I don't do the right thing all the time, I am trying to change that a little bit everyday. I want everyday to be less sinful and flawed than the day before, I want to move closer to God, I want to be more like Christ everyday.

The truth is I am not entitled to anything, I don't deserve this, I don't deserve the love of Christ but He gives it and gives it abundantly (1Timothy1:14). So, if we really love people as Christ loves then we love them like they deserve it even on their bad days. I don't deserve to even be alive writing this right now but with Christ in me I am a daughter of the King and I have been given life through Him alone. I don't deserve the Son of God to lay down His life for my inadequacy and sinful fallen nature. I deserve death and I deserve hell; God loves us so much though that He covered our sin and gave us the gift of His love and life.

Lord, when things get tough when I am having a bad day and it feels like everything is falling apart, let me be reminded who is in control and that it's not me. When I think that I am a "good" person and I deserve better treatment or more preference, remind me that I am not good, I don't deserve anything good; remind me that you give me the things I don't deserve anyways because you love me. Lord, show me your beauty and the lesson in every hard time. Draw me closer to you no matter what it costs me because I don't deserve anything yet through you I have more than everything. Thank you for you abounding extravagant love for me, thank you for calling me your own. Thank you for being everything I could never deserve. I love you Father, stretch me daily, I never want to cease to grow in you.

Next time you feel like you don't deserve something because you are entitled to better remember Jesus on the cross enduring all the punishment for sin that He did not commit; He did not deserve one second of the pain and suffering that He endured for our sake. Jesus is the only one who was ever entitled to more than He received from this world. Therefore, out of love endure the minimal suffering and pain this world has to offer in His name.

In Christ's Love,

Reed Eden