The Journey Begins...

I am preparing to begin the Table Internship with the Rock of Roseville September 12th, which is approaching quickly. I am so blessed with the ways the Lord has already blessed my finances and provided for my tuition, I am still believing for miracles to reduce or eliminate my debt all together, I am very excited to see what the Lord will do in these areas.
God has already been seriously working on my heart for the past 8 months now, since I was baptized in the Dandelion's (community home) bathtub on January 22 of this year. I have been receiving so much healing already in so many areas that I never even knew existed. I am truly a different person, I live a changed life. I could not live this changed, and changing, life without the direction and strength of Jesus.


I plan to keep you all updated as I go through this 9 month intense process, I want to share my journey with you.

I will quickly share something the Lord revealed to me a little while ago, just to kick things off. I have been praying for months for the Lord to romance me. I wanted to feel like His bride, I wanted to know His husbands love for me. So I kept praying and praying and feeling a little discouraged I kept praying anyways. All of a sudden the Lord began to speak to me through others telling me that this season in my life was going to be one of romance and love from Him. I was so excited, the Lord was responding to my prayers in His timing. I began digging into the book of Song of Solomon and it came alive to me in a whole new way that I have never experienced, I have read the words before but never had I truly felt the passion behind them. As I read over and over the woman in the story being called the fair one, I recalled that my own name means fair one. I previously thought that was a boring or insignificant meaning for my name. I even told people how I felt about my name. One person in particular told me he thought it was really awesome that my name meant fair one. After this new revelation I shared with him my new found love for my name and its meaning. 


Behold, you are fair, my love! Behold, you are fair! -Song of Solomon 4:1a

This Isn't Burger King

The Kingdom of God is not a Burger King, you can't have it your way. I feel like Christianity has become so watered down and convenient that it can be anything to anyone at anytime. You can't order grace and mercy with extra forgiveness and love hold the conviction and accountability. That is simply a recipe for disaster, yet it is what Christianity offers. The church has been conforming to the culture in an attempt to "remain relevant". The gospel doesn't need any help being relevant, the gospel stands all on its own. We can only hinder the gospel it is impossible to make it better or more relevant. 

If you walk into any Christian book store you will find a lot of self-help with a dash of scripture when it fits. Scripture is often used out of context to back up the methods and ideas of these self-help books. It's not all bad or all wrong, there are good biblical books out there. There are also good books to help people get through issues they have. We have to be cautious to see if the book is biblical and leads to Jesus being the ultimate answer. If the book gives you 12 ways to change in your own strength, that's great but it's not biblical. We should be doing nothing in our own strength. Especially in western culture we want the quick fix answer to everything, so if there is a book we can buy that will tell us how to fix our problems we will buy it. The funniest part is that there is one book like that that will answer everything else, we just don't like the answers it gives so we seek a second opinion, a more convenient answer.

I don't want to participate in convenience store Christianity. I am tired of trying to find a short cut to the answer I already know. I don't want to try and take the back roads instead of the path the Lord has laid out. I am guilty of trying to seek the quick and easy answer, the answer that doesn't crush my flesh, the answer that allows me to feel the greatest amount of results for the least amount of conviction and responsibility. Thank God that He forgives my desire to short-cut His plans, rob Him of His full glory, and satisfy my flesh. He is a good good God, He does give love, grace, mercy, forgiveness, and salvation; He also despises sin, convicts us, and asks for obedience. It's a package deal, you don't get to take the parts of Christianity that you like and leave the hard parts behind. 

So, no, this is not Burger King, you can't have it your way, it will be His way and He will get all the glory in the end. 

Honesty is the Best Policy

Honesty is the best policy, even when it hurts, even when you look stupid, even when it means admitting you are wrong and asking for forgiveness. This is one of the characteristics that makes us more Christ-like, and not just believers in God but actual disciples of Him. We are not perfect, we are fallen sinners who are always going to make mistakes. When you are truly allowing more of Him to reside in you those mistakes will become less and less, more importantly you will recognize them and strive to correct them. As you become more like Christ it becomes easier to recognize things within you that don't agree with Him and His perfect nature.

I was in a situation where I made a pretty terrible mistake and hurt people because I was allowing my sin to control my behavior instead of Christ. As soon as I recognized the behavior as being sinful, wrong, and hurtful I needed to ask for forgiveness from the Lord and from the person that I hurt. I am not saying any of this to brag that I am a good person or that I should be respected for what I did. I am only encouraging fellow believers to step up and admit their faults and mistakes with humility and genuinely ask for forgiveness. 

It is so easy to justify and rationalize why our behavior is acceptable and even easier to justify and rationalize why we are not required to admit the fault and ask for forgiveness. I really wanted to talk myself out of confronting my sin and correcting it. Confronting this issue meant telling someone that didn't even know me that I had sinned against them, I actually had to hurt this person by telling them the truth of what I did and then ask for their forgiveness for the hurt I just caused. I was most upset with myself for misrepresenting Christ with my behavior than anything else. The best way to correct that is to admit my fault, be honest! If I can admit that I did something completely wrong and outside the character of Christ, then I can at least demonstrate His humility and love in the situation.

This is why Christians are labeled as hypocrites, because we are! We aren't hypocrites simply because we say one thing and do another, although that is part of it. We are mainly hypocrites because we preach one thing, do another, and condemn those around us for the very same behavior. It's amazing what happens when you can actually admit that you are hypocritical because you are imperfect. People don't expect perfection for the most part, they actually desire transparency and genuineness. People want to know that we are sinners just like them, and that we know that. The world wants to hear Christians ask for forgiveness and admit their faults because they want the truth. This is why Christianity is so unappealing, it is our misrepresentation of Christ, the gospel, and the character of God. It is because people see lying, hypocritical, sinners condemning the world around them for the very sins they themselves live in. If Christ wouldn't have acted the way you acted then tell someone that. Don't continue to perpetuate the impression of Christianity as a luke-warm, watered down, exclusive club of hypocrites. Instead ask for forgiveness, say that you misrepresented Christ, in that simple act you are now actually representing Christ and His character. 

So be honest, admit when you are wrong. Ask for someone's forgiveness when you treat them in an un-Christ-like way. Even when it means it hurts your pride, actually, especially when it hurts your pride. Don't let your mistake, your sin also be a misrepresentation of Christ. Let's get honest, transparent, and humble; strive to be more like Christ. Get uncomfortable, purge the sin response, love like Christ loves.

Honesty really is the best policy. Get real!

In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

I Don't Deserve This!

 There are a lot of times in life that we all feel like we don't deserve something, many times this feeling stems from a sense of entitlement. Usually we say we don't deserve to be treated a certain way or we say it as a way to infer that we deserve more than what we have received. I am just as guilty of this as anyone else, I feel like for some reason I am different than other people and that I shouldn't have to endure someone being less than polite. The truth is no one should be rude, mean, hurtful, inconsiderate of others but the reality is we all act this way at times. We all have bad days; we all react without thinking our actions through sometimes; we all make assumptions. Worst of all we all feel we are entitled to days where our behavior is poor but we also feel entitled to never have to experience the repercussions of someone else having that same poor behavior.

We all need to learn to love each other in the way that Christ loves us. I know that the WWJD fad made the question a bad secular joke rather than a true question to keep ourselves in check. I really do think about this a lot when I am struggling what to do in a situation or when I know the actions I want to take are wrong. I honestly ask myself, what would Jesus do, I mean if He was really here in my shoes what would His response be? It doesn't make me perfect I don't do the right thing all the time, I am trying to change that a little bit everyday. I want everyday to be less sinful and flawed than the day before, I want to move closer to God, I want to be more like Christ everyday.

The truth is I am not entitled to anything, I don't deserve this, I don't deserve the love of Christ but He gives it and gives it abundantly (1Timothy1:14). So, if we really love people as Christ loves then we love them like they deserve it even on their bad days. I don't deserve to even be alive writing this right now but with Christ in me I am a daughter of the King and I have been given life through Him alone. I don't deserve the Son of God to lay down His life for my inadequacy and sinful fallen nature. I deserve death and I deserve hell; God loves us so much though that He covered our sin and gave us the gift of His love and life.

Lord, when things get tough when I am having a bad day and it feels like everything is falling apart, let me be reminded who is in control and that it's not me. When I think that I am a "good" person and I deserve better treatment or more preference, remind me that I am not good, I don't deserve anything good; remind me that you give me the things I don't deserve anyways because you love me. Lord, show me your beauty and the lesson in every hard time. Draw me closer to you no matter what it costs me because I don't deserve anything yet through you I have more than everything. Thank you for you abounding extravagant love for me, thank you for calling me your own. Thank you for being everything I could never deserve. I love you Father, stretch me daily, I never want to cease to grow in you.

Next time you feel like you don't deserve something because you are entitled to better remember Jesus on the cross enduring all the punishment for sin that He did not commit; He did not deserve one second of the pain and suffering that He endured for our sake. Jesus is the only one who was ever entitled to more than He received from this world. Therefore, out of love endure the minimal suffering and pain this world has to offer in His name.

In Christ's Love,

Reed Eden

Middle Grey

I feel like if the Church as a whole had a color attached to it, like a high school or a sports team, our color would be middle grey. It's the perfect in between color, it's not too dark and depressing like black; it's also not too bright and cheery like white; it's comfortably in the middle. It makes everyone happy, we can easily blend in with the black in the world with out being too awkward, yet without completely conforming.


Christians like to stay as close to the worldly things as we can and still feel like we can legitimately call ourselves Christians still. The truth is that our faith is nothing if it's not 100%, we are either for God or we are against Him, that means you don't get to pick, choose, or edit His words. Even if you choose to be against God you can't change His words and His truth, you can choose to be deceived and you can choose to fight that truth but you cannot change it.


As Christians we are terrible at the part of Christianity that makes us step out of our comfort zone and actually be different than the rest of the world. We all like the part of Christianity that donates money to charity, we even like the part where we donate our time and talents, that's easy. The reason why most of us like this aspect of Christianity is because we get all the glory, we have lots of people who thank us and tell us how wonderful we are for giving up so much to help others. That part is easy, it's easy to give from your extra and your abundance and then be rewarded for it; the problem is this is a worldly reward and it will be the only thing you ever get if you are not giving the glory back to God, the only one who deserves it.


When it comes right down to it we don't want to disagree too strongly or at all with the things of this world because that means that people are going to judge us and say mean things about us. We don't want to lose friends, we don't want to be outcasts, we don't want people to.....catch the trend here, it's all about us and other people. No where in this mindset are we concerned with God and His thoughts and feelings about us, we justify our behavior that it's okay to keep silent, it's okay to not be too different; we tell ourselves as long as we don't commit the sin that we see all around us then we are still doing right.


It's comfortable to keep watching inappropriate TV shows and movies, and a little worldly music won't hurt, and it's okay to sin as long as it's not too often and as long as it's not one of the "really bad" sins. I think the classification hierarchy we have created for which sins are worse than others is absolutely ridiculous too, to God all sin is evil and He despises it all equally, there is no such thing as better or worse sin.


I am by no means perfect, it is easy to write about the things I have struggled with and continue to struggle with. I don't want to allow the enemy to use the social pressure of the world to make me choose to conform to worldly standards in exchange for my Father's standards. I struggle everyday with making compromises to keep the peace and maintain my image so that people will not think I'm too crazy. God says we will be persecuted because of Him, people will think we are foolish, people with say terrible things about us, we will lose friends. The best part about all of that is knowing that it is all worth it, He always has good intentions towards us, He is alive within us and is always with us, and He loves us so much that He reserved a place in heaven just for us because we are called His own.


Pick a side, choose your team color, black or white, there is no middle grey.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

Compromise

I don't understand why we are expected to compromise our beliefs; what I really don't understand though is why we allow the expectation to actually cause us to compromise. As Christians we are often expected to compromise who we are and what we believe in because it is offensive and intolerant of sin; sin that many people cling to and do not want to give up. As humans we do our very best to be as selfish as possible, we want what we want when we want it and we want the best of everything; we want to be able to call ourselves Christians and still hold onto as much sinful behavior as possible. We are fallen and sinful and imperfect and we are not capable of being more than that without Christ living within us. God calls us to give up our sinful ways, repent, and follow Him; He doesn't tell us that it's ok to hold on to one or two things that we really can't seem to let go of, in fact those one or two things are where the enemy has the best stronghold and those are the areas we need to give up most.


There is a difference between love and tolerance, we as Christians are called to love all people as Christ loves us we are not called to tolerate sin just as Christ did not tolerate sin. I think we get confused here, many people who are not Christians think that love and tolerance are the same thing, I can completely love someone without encouraging and tolerating sinful behavior. Likewise, it is possible to be tolerant and not love someone at all; in fact I would argue that if you are tolerant then you aren't being loving at all you are being complacent and silent. If we really love people as Christ did we would not want to see them walking on a path that leads straight to hell we would not tolerate that behavior, we would want to save them. We would never be able to see someone we love on this path and just sit back and tolerate it just because they might be offended by us. In the end does it really matter if someone was offended by Christ in you if they were saved because of Christ in you.


Christians are expected to tolerate sin in the world but sin is not tolerant of Christians, no one is condemned for not believing and being a Christian; in fact the culture encourages us to not be Christians. The world loves the humanitarian aspect of Christianity, they love the good parts that are self-serving, they want the smiles and rainbows but when you talk about why we do the things we do when you actually want to share the love that is in your heart that causes you to appear good at all that is discouraged above all. The world wants us to just serve them as much as possible as long as we don't talk about the love of the Lord that is within us. The world wants us to all just "get along" they want us to all become tolerant and complacent.


We are called to offend people, we are called to offend them because of the cross through Him because He says that it is offensive. We have to offend for the right reasons in the right ways though, if people are offended because of Him in us, if they are offended by the cross, if they are offended by Jesus then so be it. We have to be cautious not to offend our of our own fallen nature and sinful ways. We cannot compromise who Jesus is we are either sharing who He is and allowing Him to live within us or we are living in ourselves and representing the enemy, you cannot serve two masters. I just want Him to live within me, I want people to see the love of Christ through me, I want to allow Him to work through me for the good of His Kingdom. I don't want to compromise on the basis of possible offense ever again, if we take away the parts of Jesus that we think might offend someone and water Him down we are only robbing ourselves and those we are trying to reach. You can't water Jesus down, you are either sharing His love and character or you are creating something false completely. You can't have one part of Him and not the rest, it's all or nothing. He desires all of us, He wants us to live for Him completely. He loves us more than we can even comprehend, love people more than they can comprehend, don't compromise just love.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

Change=Growth

I love the thought of change because change means growth and that is always good, not always easy but always good for sure. I love when God puts things in our hands that we think we could never handle, things we never thought we could do; yet through Him anything is possible and He loves to use us in our weakness. Change causes us to step out of our comfort zones and reevaluate our lives or some aspect of it, we don't always enjoy this time because it means we can't just run on auto-pilot we actually have to think about what we are doing. We don't always enjoy a challenge when it means our own lives are being challenged down to the very core of who we are and what we believe.


The enemy loves these times of challenge and change because they produce moments of weakness and instability in our hearts and minds that may not be there on a regular basis. He loves to use these times to plant seeds of doubt and fear and unbelief in our hearts, it's our job to rely on God alone and not allow those seeds to take root and spread in our hearts and souls. These times are also some of the biggest times of spiritual growth and depth because we are more reliant on God than ever. It's amazing to watch and see how God can use any situation for His good in the end, He can take anything you offer Him and make it work for His Kingdom. The biggest, dumbest mistakes in our lives can turn into the most monumental victories for Him, the story of something going from worst to best because of God is a story of triumph and a powerful testimony of His immense love for His children.


The valleys in life, the low moments, the times when you feel like your whole world is falling apart around you and you don't know what to do except throw up your hands and cry out to God; He loves those times because you are finally completely reliant on Him. The goal is to learn and grow from these experiences so that you realize that God will always take care of you, you can always rely on Him, no matter how terrible things seem He has a plan and it will work for the good. What seems like an eternity to us is the blink of an eye in the scheme of things, just remember when you are in your lowest moments that God will get you through it and you will look back and think what a small insignificant amount of time it actually was.


I really hate how I allow myself to become stressed about things of this world, I allow myself to lean on my own understandings and in my insufficiency I can't seem to find the answers, I am struggling to stay above water, and really all I need to do is rely on Him. When I rely on Him I find myself filled with peace in the most stressful situations that would have normally caused me to feel like the end of the world was near, God works best in our lives when we put our faith and hope in Him alone. Don't put your hope in this or that specific thing happening, put your hope in His faithfulness, His goodness, His love because those things never fail and in the end those things have your best interests at heart. When we put our hope in things or actions that are dependent on our will and human nature we are almost always disappointed but when we put our hope in Him and depend on Him and His will we can never be disappointed because we only want what He has for us, even if we don't always understand it.


It is a daily struggle to put this kind of faith in Him, I am a planner, I like to know all the answers, I like to know all the variables so I can create the best possible plan of action. God has really been working on me and giving up that illusion of control because I don't know everything, I don't have all the answers, in fact I don't have any of the answers. He told me there will be obstacles in my life and I don't need to know what they are because if I know I will just try to solve them, He wants my complete faith not my flawed plans and ideas. So I'm doing my best every day to patiently wait upon Him, His timing, His will, and to not let my faith waiver. I have to remind myself all the time that He will handle it and everything will be ok, I start to get nervous when I don't see certain things falling into place when I think they should, God isn't on my time constraints and I have to quit trying to put Him into my boxes of possibility.


Change causes growth and increases our faith and strength in Him. So, I love change, it's not always fun or easy when I'm going through it but the Lord comes through like He promises, like He always does. He never fails me and I look back and laugh at the things I worried about, I laugh at the stress I placed on myself. I have to remind myself, this is God we are talking about not any one of a million people in my life that either have or will disappoint me; He never fails, He is perfect! Thank you Father for being the one thing we can always count on, the one thing that never changes, never fails, always loves, always protects, thank you for being you. Forgive me for being me in my fallen, imperfect, human, sinful nature. Help me to rely more and more on you and less and less on myself. I pray for your will to be mine and your heart to be mine, I want only what you have for me even when it's not easy, even when I can't plan it all out, even when I don't have any of the answers. I put my faith and hope in you alone. I love you Father!


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

The Church Is Not A Building

So, I know this is something you have all heard a million times probably; the church isn't a building that you go to on Sundays, the church is the body of believers. We all know this except we don't live this way, that's why we don't like church, that's why people say things like "I don't need to go to church as long as I have a personal relationship with God". Church is supposed to be so much more, and so much less, than this institution we have created, I think this is why I have such a negative image of large churches. It's great that a church's numbers grow and they are blessed with more and more people attending, why are they really there though. I think if we are really honest with ourselves we would see that most of the church consists of consumers and spectators who happily sit on the sidelines taking what they like and criticizing the rest. I have definitely been a part of both of the aforementioned groups, on some level I wasn't even aware of it.

Let's be honest it makes us feel good to go to church on Sunday, somehow that make us feel like we can check God off of our to do list for the rest of the week. We listen to a sermon about how much He loves us (and He does) and it make us feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Every once in a while there is a convicting sermon or two in there where you leave either making a decision to change, that will likely last a day or two at best, or you criticize the Pastor because you don't like feeling convicted, I don't know how that was ever enough for me. Satan loves these kind of Christians because in their hearts they are serving satan and on the outside they are proclaiming the name of Christ, all we really are in that case is servants of satan that call ourselves Christians and cause others around them to receive a wrong image of what the church and Christians are supposed to look like. We can't serve two masters, you love one and hate the other, regardless of what you say the truth is in your heart.

I really don't like to bash the church, I think we have all heard a lot of this and in a lot of ways we know what the problems are. I also believe that there are a lot deeper issues going on that no one is talking about, we are talking about the outside of the bowl when the inside is filthy and that's where we eat from. So, I really feel like what I am saying isn't just complaining about things that I can't or won't change, I'm not complaining about anything actually, I just want to see the church get remotely close to the way God intended it.

The church is supposed to be a community, a community of believers in Christ that strive everyday to walk with Him. People that know that they are sinners in need of a savior and they live like it everyday. It doesn't mean we don't make mistakes, we are definitely still sinners, we just put our everything into loving our Creator and living for Him in obedience. I have a dream of church being all around us, that you can go to your neighbors house and that's church just as much as the buildings we go to now because God dwells in us not in the building. I believe God really does meet us when we seek Him, I want to constantly and consistently seek Him and His presence. I want to see us live with people who challenge us daily to go deeper in our relationships with Him, people that build us up, people that love one another. I want to see Christ in the people that profess to be Christians, including myself. I don't want to be lukewarm, I want to be held accountable even when it's not easy, especially when it's not easy.The church should be the community we live in.

Can you imagine really living out the things you read about in the Bible, every single day. I always used to feel like church was a history lesson, and in a lot of ways it is, it's also prophetic and current and alive. I just can't imagine ever trying to live this half way, it's just not possible, you're either all in or your not. I want to see people loving, serving, and honoring each other on more than Sunday mornings. I don't want to put on a happy face for church service and pretend to be something I'm not, I want to be myself, an imperfect sinner who struggles every single day. I want to be held accountable in areas of weakness and hold others accountable in their areas of weakness too. The church should be more of a support network for people who want to live Christ centered lives. The church could spend a lot more time and money reaching out if we were living as a community together all the time because we would be stronger in Him.

I just pray for the church as a whole to become the community.

In Christ's Love,

Reed Eden

Faith Is Often Mistaken For Insanity

I suppose this shouldn't really surprise us, I mean the Bible tells us several times that the world will think we are foolish and crazy for our faith and beliefs. It's just so funny to me that the world sees me as crazy because I rely on the Creator of the universe. I guess the real problem is that they just don't believe in Him or the cross, if any of the scientists were given the opportunity to talk to the creator of the entire universe they would jump at the opportunity. The funny part is that they do have that opportunity they just choose not to believe in Him, they choose to lean on their own understanding.


Even though I grew up as a Christian and always believed God existed there were definitely times in my life where I had my doubts, doubts I allowed the enemy to sneak into my thoughts. I recognize that tactic now and I don't have any doubt in my mind that not only does God exist, He is complete control. It's ironic the same people who claim not to believe in God at all are the first one to blame Him when anything bad in this world happens. God gave us free will and with that we all choose to be sinners, God doesn't stop us from doing terrible things to ourselves and others because He gave us the free will to choose right from wrong, good from evil, etc. That doesn't mean that He doesn't offer us a way out, and He can use everything for His good in the end, no matter what they enemy tries to use for evil God can change it to be for His good.


I don't really care if people think I am crazy, I suppose by the world standards I am a little crazy but that's ok with me. I actually don't want people to just think I am the same as everyone else, I want people to say I am different, I want people to say I am foolish. I am not so concerned with the labels but the Bible does say that followers of Him will be called these things so I am more than ok with that. I am not striving to simply be called crazy that would be easily achieved and not beneficial, I actually could care less what people call me or say about me, well I try not to care about it anyways.


The point is people think that it is completely insane to put all of your hope and trust into something that is unseen, to the world you are just crossing your fingers, closing your eyes, jumping off a cliff, and hoping that there is something at the bottom to catch you. The difference is I'm not just blindly jumping off a cliff, I am jumping off with my faith placed firmly in the promises of the Lord. I am not just crossing my fingers, I am praying, seeking His will, reading the Word, and making decisions based on His will for my life not my own because this is not my life it's His. I can see why this seems insane to someone who doesn't believe, to them they look down at the bottom of that cliff and they see rocks and low tide and danger; I look down the cliff and I see the open arms of my Father waiting to catch me and put me exactly where He wants me to be, but I have to jump first. It's such a different and completely amazing way to live your life when you put your faith in the one thing that will never ever fail you; to put your faith in the one thing that always has your best interests at heart even when you can't see it or understand it.


So maybe you call it insanity, I call it faith.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

No Such Thing As Good People

There are no good people in the whole world, there is not one single person who is good. Only God is good, only the reflection of Him in us is good. The world has such skewed definitions of good and evil, right and wrong, and unfortunately a lot of that misguidance spills over to Christians as well. How many times have you heard the statement "Well, I'm a good person." people love to determine their own goodness, it's not ours to determine because the only goodness we have is His. We think that being a worldly definition of good will make us closer to God and it doesn't, we don't understand why we can never be good enough. We can't ever be good enough because we are not good at all; only God is good and we cannot even begin to fathom what His goodness looks like; we can only allow Him to live within us and reflect His goodness through us.


The world has a definition of good and evil, right and wrong that is completely different than the real Godly definitions. These worldly definitions make exceptions for evil and wrong and put them into the good and right categories or into a grey area. We say that certain sin is allowed in certain situations and it will no longer be wrong. We allow people that we define as mostly good to commit evil acts and not be held accountable because they are mostly good by our standards. We say it's ok to lie if you are sparing someone's feelings, it's ok to murder someone if they killed someone you love, it's ok to be deceitful if it gets you something that you are 'entitled' to. These things are not right they are not good, no matter how you look at it lying, deceit, murder, sin, none of it is good, none of those words would be used to describe God, who is in fact the definition of good.


The problem is some where along the line we decided that we were capable of creating our own definitions, we were convinced by the lies of the enemy to allow for changes in good and evil to allow for grey areas. We cannot allow for grey areas, God does not ever say something is only a little sinful or only sometimes sinful. God defines good and evil, right and wrong, it is not our job or our right to make these determinations. This goes back to the fact that He is the creator, imagine if you created something and then someone told you that it wasn't correct they thought it would be more beneficial to change certain things about it. I'm sure a lot of us have received criticism like this before, but what if that same person didn't just tell you they disagreed but actually just made changes to your creation without your permission. This may have also happened to you before, I promise if you have ever experienced this it was not a joyful experience, it most likely upset you greatly. How much more does God have a right to make these determinations about His own creations. I only want His will, His goodness, His love to reflect through me. I don't want to make decisions on my own because I am not my own, I am His and His alone.


So, I'm not a good person and neither are you, there is good in me though, His name is Jesus Christ and He lives inside of me. When you see goodness in me, praise Him, give Him the glory for it is only Him in me that causes anything good. I am but a sinner without His love, mercy, grace, joy, and goodness; with those things I am a daughter, a bride, loved, and His goodness reflects through me. I am but only the vessel that He would choose to use me, love me, love you.


My your goodness radiate from my heart all the days of my life, I love you Lord!


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

YES! Woman

It is so ridiculous when I think about how much the world around me controls what I do, how I do it, when I do something, why I do it, and who I do something for. Think about it, how often do you let what someone else MIGHT think affect your actions? I know I don't think I do it that often but, if I am really honest with myself I do it a lot more than I realize. I am not always consciously thinking about others around me; that's even worse to me though, that means I have been doing it for so long that it's just natural, it means that sometimes I don't even realize I am doing it. The first thing I want to do is ask the Lord to make me more aware of these thoughts and actions or lack thereof. 

How many times have you ever wanted to do something but you don't, you hold back, all because someone MIGHT think you are different or crazy or heaven forbid one of those Christians! I keep emphasizing the word might because a lot of what holds us back isn't even the people around us, often it is our own minds and the enemy. We let the possibility of negative reactions stop us from acting at all, so maybe we need to also ask the Lord to help us not always think the worst of people, to help us to not assume their thoughts and feelings. I am not saying that we should never consider where we are and who we are with, nor am I saying that we should just act without any consideration of the possible consequences. I am saying that we should ask for the Lord's direction, if He asks us to do something then nothing else matters except our obedience to Him. If the Lord asks you to do something you can trust that it will work out according to His plans and His good.

Sometimes I am just scared; I just allow fear itself to creep in and stop me, a lot of times I don't even know what I am afraid of. A few minutes later I will reflect on the situation and realize I had nothing to be afraid of, I often find that it's the moments when God wants to do the most amazing things that I am most afraid to step out. I have to remind myself that He is in control, He is trustworthy, He will not let me fall if I step out in faith. This doesn't mean that things are always going to go perfectly the way YOU envision them in your mind, remember these are God's plans not yours; expect Him to show up don't limit how He shows up. People are still people and they may react negatively you can't control that but you can control your actions and reactions. The point is to not allow the fear of being mocked or scorned or laughed at keep you from obeying Him.

I want to be a YES! Woman, when the Lord wants to use me I want to answer Him with an unwavering YES!. I don't want to question His judgement and direction, I do want to seek Him and His will, I do want to make sure that I am obeying Him and that I am not being deceived. I would never suggest to blindly act on something that you are having trouble discerning where it came from, don't use this as an excuse either though. I just want to be the kind of woman that seeks wholeheartedly after His heart, His will, His plans, I want to know Him so intimately that my heart becomes His heart and my thoughts become His thoughts. 

Lord, give me the wisdom and discernment to know your voice and obey, to say yes whenever you call, to love those around me without discrimination, trust you completely that I would never again fear the things of this world, that I would not be controlled by it, that I would not allow the enemy to have any power over my thoughts or my actions. Lord, I ask that when I hear and do not obey, when I allow the world to make my decisions, when I am fearful, when I give in to the enemy and his lies, I pray that I quickly repent and ask for your forgiveness and mercy. Thank you Father for being always faithful, trustworthy, and loving. I love you with all my heart!

I want to be a 'YES WOMAN', when God says go, do, jump, run, give, LOVE...I want to just say YES, not why, just YES! Lord, give me the courage to just say yes, no matter what that looks like to the world. I love HIM!

In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

Offend Me Please

I came to the revelation this weekend that we not only need to be offended but should desire such offense. This is not meant to come from a hateful place or to be birthed from the enemy in anyway. The word does talk about how people will be offended by it; people will be offended by Christians. In John 6:60-70 the disciples are grumbling and Jesus asks if they are offended, He goes on to explain that the flesh is nothing and what He is offering is the spirit who gives life. So even Jesus offended His disciples with truth of the Spirit and we are called to live like Christ lived, for He lives within us.

One of the definitions of offend says:  to cause difficulty, discomfort, or injury. Obviously, I am not referring to injury; I am referring to being uncomfortable or finding things difficult to deal with. I know that I am a sinner, every day I sin, because of the cross and what Jesus did for me on it I am washed clean through His blood and repentance. Just because we know that we are sinners, that we are imperfect; we should not feel comfortable with that sin, it should be something we are weeding more and more out of our lives every day. If we don't continuously weed out the sin from our gardens then we will never produce fruit because it will constantly be overtaken, choked out, and destroyed by the weeds of sin. 

I want to be offended on a daily basis, by the word, in prayer, from other believers. I want to continue to grow constantly and if I am not being offended by sin then I am the same as I was yesterday and for me that's not acceptable. Like I have said before I am by no means perfect so although I do my best to strive to be different every day that doesn't mean I actually do it all the time; there are plenty of days I am exactly the same or worse than the day before. Things of God will offend us when we are in sin, when there is sin in our heart and we feel convicted about that sin we feel offended as well. It makes us uncomfortable to admit sin and acknowledge that it exists in our own lives; it is difficult to accept discipline from the Father or be held accountable from a fellow Christian. 

No one likes to be told they are wrong, or they have made a mistake, or any other negative thing for that matter. I think the goal here has to be not to think of these things in a negative light, we need to recognize that if we are offended in this way we are in fact growing in Christ and that should over joy us. If we offend one another it should be in the way that Jesus offended the disciples by teaching truth through the spirit, there is a way to cause offense that Jesus would never do, I think we have all been offended in this way before. Sin should be so offensive to us that we just can't stand but to make a change in ourselves to get it out of the way of our relationship with Him. 

Sometimes people are offended in the wrong way too, sometimes people allow themselves to be offended by things they do not understand. I am guilty of this type of offense too, I have been offended by people who act in ways I do not understand at the time as well as I'm sure I have offended others in this way. This happens a lot with moves of the Holy Spirit, many people just do not understand what is going on, they don't believe that what they are seeing is genuine; they don't understand why it isn't happening to them if it is real. This is especially true in manifestations of the Holy Spirit; when people see others shaking, convulsing, laughing uncontrollably, falling on the floor, being healed, they immediately think it is ridiculous and are caught in unbelief. I was one of these people previously, I didn't believe in this kind of thing and I definitely didn't understand it. 

When you finally let your guard down and just say yes to the Spirit and allow Him to move in you, no matter what it looks like, you will know that these things are very much real. It doesn't mean we will all experience the Holy Spirit in such outwardly dramatic ways, but even if it doesn't look like that on the outside it will feel like that on the inside. He wants to encounter us with a fresh touch of His love and in a new way, to renew our love and passion for Him, we just have to say yes and let Him move in ANY way He wants to. I think, actually I know, you will find that if you let go of your expectations of how, why, when, what, etc; if we just expect Him to move, that is exactly what He will do. When we put Him in a box and wait for Him to come into our box of expectations He may never show up because you are waiting for your way instead of seeking His.

In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

Renewed Motivation

God is so good, I know I say that all the time but it's because it's so true! He always knows exactly what we need and when we need it. Tonight I really was feeling tired and worn down from two very busy weeks, I haven't felt like I had much time to come up for air. I have been waking up at 4am to get in some quality time with God in the mornings and start my day off right; needless to say it's been wearing me out a little bit. I really just needed some rest and restoration and He gave that to me tonight.


God provided a time of fellowship and encouragement that I desperately needed, I really can't comprehend being a secluded Christian. I can't imagine not having the love and encouragement of at least one fellow believer around me occasionally at very least. I am so fed and renewed from spending time in fellowship with other believers, it gives me such motivation and joy. When I can openly talk about Christ and what He is doing in my life and receive encouragement and loving feedback; when I can actually have a conversation with someone about God; it is so amazing, it just makes me over joyed.


It's so nice to be able to tell someone all your hopes and dreams, the plans God has for you, and to have them share in your joy and excitement. I know we should be able to talk about Christ to anyone, that doesn't mean you can't enjoy conversation with believers as well. I would argue it is completely necessary to have fellowship, God even says that where more than two are gathered He is there also, we were not made to be alone. We were created for contact with other people, we are meant first and foremost to share the gospel with those who don't know it and to strive to be Christ-like. We are called to love people, people are also called to love us; it's ok to receive sometimes too, it is acceptable to be fed and encouraged and ministered to. The key is letting God lead you into times of ministering and times of being ministered to; to know when to graciously accept from others and when to selflessly give.


I am so excited for the things God has in store for me in my life, I know that He has some big plans for His Kingdom through me. I pray that I listen and seek Him in everything that I do; I can't wait to see His promises continue to come to life in me.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

Just Do It

I don't know how many other people feel this way but I know that sometimes when I know I should be praying I find myself feeling like I am against a wall, kind of like writers block. Sometimes I just feel like I need to have a prepared speech before I pray, of course that isn't true. I know that I don't actually need to prepare or rehearse anything to say to God, He just wants me to talk to Him.


Sometimes I just don't know where to start my conversations with Him, once I get talking I can usually just keep on talking for a little while. I find a good place to start is always with praise and thanksgiving, just telling Him how good He is and how much I love Him. I thank Him for breath of life a lot, I think I do that because it is so basic to us to breathe, it's something we don't even think about. He has to either give or take away our breath so, every day that I wake up I thank Him for giving me breath and giving me the opportunity to further His Kingdom for another day.


Even after I start talking sometimes I find myself at a loss for words, I think a lot of times I feel like He already knows everything so what's the point of talking to Him about it. I came to the revelation tonight that sometimes just talking to God about what is going on in your life, telling Him about your day, telling Him about your problems; it really helps to get the conversation going. I think that is why I find that God speaks to me more when I write in my journal; I am writing about the things that He is doing, about things in my life, He responds when I talk to Him about things.


God does already know everything, He knew long before you were born the exact moment that you would enter this world and the exact moment you will leave it, and everything in between. Although, He knows all of this He still wants to talk to us, He wants to help us through these things. When we don't talk to Him we are just blindly walking through life without direction; it would be like driving to the opposite side of the country and never asking the person in the passenger seat to tell you what the map says. God has the map of our lives and we don't know all the answers; talking to Him, seeking His guidance, and His direction allows us glimpses into the future and keeps us from going astray or getting distracted.


Still other times prayer just overwhelms me, I feel like everyone wants me to pray for them (and I'm not even a pastor or a leader, I can't imagine how they feel). Don't misunderstand me here, it's not that I don't want to pray for people, I do, I just want it to be heartfelt and meaningful when I do. I put to much pressure on myself though, I make up all these crazy rules that make me feel guilty if I don't pray long enough for someone or if I simply forget to pray for them. I never want anyone to ask me for prayer and not receive it, now that I think about it I should never ever have trouble finding something to talk to God about because there are always a bunch of people that need prayer. The focus of our prayers all too often begins "God please help ME with..." maybe we should spend a little less time sending up requests on our own behalf and spend way more time praying for others.


I believe the Lord wants to raise up an entire nation of intercessors; not just people who pray when they have a bad day or think they may die; not just people who pray for themselves or their families. God wants to see people love their neighbor as themselves, pray for other people at least as much as you pray for yourself, I believe God will reward us and those we are praying for greatly for this. He wants us to pray with conviction and belief that His promises with come to pass. Every tongue shall confess, every knee will bow; there are entire nations and people groups that have never heard of His love, there are people here in our own country that have never been told what Jesus did for them. If we can find nothing else to pray for, pray for the salvation of your brothers and sisters across the world, across the nations, across our country, across the street, across the hall, maybe even across the room. I know that I want there to be less of me and more of Him, I want to put others before myself, I want to love all people. God wants to hear people love each other so much that we don't even think about our problems when we are praying, all we can think is that there are 100 other people we know that need prayer on their behalf.


Think about it this way, we have a direct line to God twenty-four hours a day seven days a week, we have plenty of time to petition on our own behalf. There are so many people out there who don't even know Him, they don't know they can ask for His help, those people are dependent on us to pray on their behalf because it is something they cannot do for themselves until they have a personal relationship with Him. I am not suggesting that we never pray for ourselves or talk to God about our own relationship with Him. That is very important, we cannot be of use to others if we don't have a good relationship with Him and maintain that relationship. We have to remain spiritually fed to be able to share with others. Even Jesus took time to pray alone and spend time with His Father, we too should spend quality time with our Father. Sometimes you just need to get really close to Him, be quiet, be still, and listen for Him to whisper into your soul.


Father please forgive me for my lack of communication with you, please show me the opportunities to pray and talk to you that I am missing every day. I love you Lord, I praise you for all you have done, are doing, and will do in the future. I pray that I find new opportunities to talk to you more and more every day, I want to pray without ceasing. I want to hear your voice constantly, I want my heart to become like your heart.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden

D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T

Calling someone dependent in today's world is one of the worst things you can say, we pride ourselves on being independent, being able to take care of ourselves. Especially in America, we don't ever want to admit that we need anyone or anything else to be happy, healthy, and successful. We like to think that the other people and things in our life are all there by our choice and that we have complete control over them and the situations. There are songs, books, seminars, and a whole slew of other things out there to help you become independent and completely self-sufficient.


I was one of those people who claimed to be independent, for several reasons, mainly because I felt I couldn't depend on anyone else. After enough times being disappointed, let down, broken promises, and abandonment you learn from the world's standards that the only thing you can rely on is yourself. You learn not to let anyone else hold the keys to your success, future, or heart; they never care as much as you do. I was always fairly mature for my age and felt the need to "mother" others around me, especially my little sister. My earthly father was never there, especially not when I needed him most. None of my boyfriends or my ex-husband ever protected me or cared for me either. The military was always a fend for yourself environment, from the beginning. The world taught me over and over again that people are just a let down and so you shouldn't put any faith or trust in anyone.


I had a revelation a few days ago that dependence is not the enemy, we just choose to be dependent on the wrong things. God created us to be dependent, we are supposed to be dependent on Him though, not this world or anything of it. We are to be dead to the things of this world and alive in Him; He is the one thing I know I can always rely on. God will never ever let me down, He can never disappoint me, He always protects me, He always loves me, and He never deserts me.  The world has caused me to be so cynical about depending on anyone or anything that it made it hard for me to let go and rely completely on God. It's difficult to go from distrusting everyone and everything to putting your everything, all of your trust and life in the hands of someone you can't even see.  The funny part is that no matter how independent any of us feel that we are, we will always be dependent on Him; without Him we would not be alive, only He can give or take away breath of life.


So, how do I embrace this dependence and learn to trust Him with my everything.  The first part for me was realizing that it's not MY everything, it's HIS everything. I am just a steward of the gifts He gives me, I am alive because of Him, everything I have, had, or will have is all because of Him. I can do all things through Him who strengthens me, nothing I do is by my own strength. When you learn that you are really capable of nothing, you also learn you are capable of anything and everything through Him and so you have more power than you ever had before. It's amazing how giving up yourself, giving up your attempt at strength, it makes you stronger and gives you more than you ever could have had on your own.  I don't want to be what this world considers as a successful, strong, independent woman; I want to be a dependent, weak, servant of my Father.   My desire is to be useful to Him, to go where He leads, to expand His Kingdom on earth.


Maybe the world thinks dependence is a terrible thing, and I can agree that dependence on this world is a terrible thing and you will most definitely be let down if that is what you rely on. However, I rely on the most high King and His destiny for me, His power through me, and His love for me. He will never disappoint me, and I think depending on the Creator of the universe to take care of my life is putting everything in safe hands. I can't imagine a better place to put my complete trust. So, I am grateful for my dependence on Him, I pray it grows daily, that I give up more of me for more of Him every chance I get.


Thank you for being dependable in and undependable world Lord, you are my rock, my fortress, and my shelter.  I love you with all that is within me, with every breath I breathe make me more like you and less like me.


In Christ's Love,
Reed Eden