We all have things in our lives that act as a curse, things that hold us back from our destiny and tie us to the past. For some of us our own minds are that curse and for others they come in the form of more tangible items that trigger the past to rush back like a waterfall. God calls us to leave home, take up our cross and follow Him, he doesn't tell us to bring along any favorite items we might have that we just can't seem to part with. We are supposed to completely die to our old selves and become a completely new creation in Christ. I'm not saying you have to give away everything you own (although He might call you to do just that) I'm just saying that we need to get rid of the things that tie us to past sin. We all love to reminisce and bask in the memory of the "good 'ol days", you know that time when everything was perfect...or at least that's how we remember it when we are in a low tide moment.
For me personally God told me I had some pretty big things hanging around that were cursing my life, the largest and probably strangest thing was my bed, yep my bed! I also needed to get rid of wedding bands from my divorce, the wedding album that went along with it, three journals, inappropriate clothing, and clothing that belonged to ex-partners. WOW! That's a lot of stuff, it is difficult too because although I wanted to be obedient and get rid of these things I also didn't want to just throw them away, to complicate things more I definitely didn't want to give my cursed items to someone else and possibly just pass on the curse. So what do you do? How do you get rid of the past without being completely wasteful? What are you supposed to get rid of anyways, is there a list in the Bible somewhere that says what to throw away? This is all going to be answered differently for every person; it is something just between you and God. I'm only going to tell you about what He called me to do and why. I will tell you though that I believe the reluctance to be "wasteful" and just throw these things away stems more from the enemy trying desperately to cling to any hope of you remaining tied to the curse. Yes it is wasteful to just throw things away for the sake of being lazy or ungrateful, but if it is a matter of being right with God and dying to self, then it is called loving obedience to your Creator and He would rather see the things of this world waste away than your soul.
We'll start with the pretty obvious and easy items, the wedding bands and album. Why was I keeping them anyways? I told myself that I didn't have to get rid of the wedding album because it was something I had put a lot of time and effort into creating, and after all that story is part of my life story. The more I think about it my marriage was something that I had put a lot of energy and work into also but when the time came it died, I mourned the loss for a very long time in various ways but none the less it was dead and gone. Why should the album survive the marriage? When I looked at the pictures about once a year or so I would lovingly remember "the way things used to be" the only problem is they were never really the way my imagination recreates them. The album was a fantasy I created of what marriage was supposed to look like not what mine actually was, I just inserted our pictures and names into a fairy tale that I created. When I would look back I see all the love in those pages and it would break my heart all over again, the truth was it was my love for marriage that was in that book rather than my actual marriage. The rings represent my failure and the loss of my hopes and dreams, I justified keeping them because they are worth money and you can't just get rid of them. The enemy would have me believe that I ruined my chance at happily ever after, love, marriage, family, children, that I threw it all away in divorce and that now God saw me unworthy of these gifts. All of that is completely false of course, none the less the album and the rings only help to trigger these feelings and emotions, it's a curse the enemy uses it as a gateway to my mind and heart; it's a door he knows he can open. Unless of course I just seal off the door and throw away the keys! These rings also served as an idol in my heart, I longed so deeply for marriage, I would take the rings out and put them on and day dream that I was married to some amazing man. There is nothing wrong with dreams unless they are creating idols in your heart then you need to tear them down and put Jesus back up on that most high place in your heart.
The clothes I need to get rid of are either just inappropriate or are souvenirs of past sexual partners, pieces of those nights or so-called relationships that I hold on to. We all keep these little mementos and for a while they torture us then all of a sudden we look back fondly on the memory tied to that object and somehow the enemy can turn the worst memory into something we long for and miss simply because we are feeling lonely. When we feel alone or sad we tend to cling to the items that are tied to someone else; something about wearing your ex's pj pants makes you feel close to him again, it makes you happy or sad or just a little less alone. We have all had these feelings about an item, sometimes it is a healthy feeling but other times these are literally soul ties that are tied to sin. Even though I don't wear these items anymore it's the final step of throwing them away that can truly be difficult, you are cutting ties forever no matter how bad your day is or how alone you feel you won't have that item there to fall back on and cling to. The good news is, if you don't have these cursed things to rely on anymore then when you feel lonely or scared or sad you fall into the arms of Jesus instead. The enemy doesn't want this, he wants to see you fall apart and slide back into the pits of hell, get rid of the items that are tied to your soul weighing it down; these things are like weights dragging you backwards when you are trying so hard to move up hill.
The journals held similar ties to my soul as the clothing; it was a place I could go back to and remember a good day or funny story. There is nothing wrong with remembering good times with friends and loved ones, or even remembering the bad times, these journals were tied exclusively to ex-lovers though. One was about my divorce, another was about some of the most heart-breaking months of my life, and the last was one that I kept as a teenager when I was dating my ex-husband. The journal I kept from my relationship with my ex-husband was probably the most damaging because it was the journal that documented the loss of my virginity and my purity. This was the journal that began a dark road into the deepest corners of hell, it was so youthful and innocent in appearance yet so damaging to the soul. God has blessed me a fully restored me from all of my past hurts and sins in these areas, it is my turn to honor him and be obedient and thankful for his mercy and grace; I threw away the last ties to the pain that held me captive for so long.
Finally, the thing you all really want to know about, my bed! Because my bed was purchased when my ex-husband and I got married it was consecrated in that marriage and there have been a lot of terrible nights spent sobbing and hurting in that bed, for a lot of different reasons. I can remember almost no good memories of it, I am convinced that demons resided in it, at one point early in my marriage my ex-husband woke up in a nightmare possessed by some sort of evil that caused him to scream and be so terrified that for weeks he couldn't hardly sleep and even after he could sleep somewhat consistently he would rarely sleep in the bed with me because it terrified him. I also woke up on several occasions completely paralyzed unable to speak or move. On top of all of that, since my ex-husband there have been several men that laid in that bed with me. That bed represents every evil in my life; it represents everything I don't ever want to be again, it is the life I died to when Christ gave me a new life in Him. I couldn't sleep in that pit of hell even one more night.
The wedding album and clothes I just threw away, it's not easy to just throw away things that used to be tied to your soul, things that were once your whole life; if it was easy you could keep them though. I am sure I will find things that I will continue to throw out that were ties to my past life. I am praying over my bed and hopefully God will allow the evil to be lifted from it that someone else might get use from it in a positive way, maybe my evil can turn to good and fulfill a need. I am praying over everything that I throw away that God will release it from my soul and not just from my bedroom.
So I just prayed over my old bed and laid my hands on it and began to rebuke Satan in Jesus name and bind and cast out the demons in Jesus mighty name commanding them to leave. The power of evil was so strong I actually stopped and prayed for increased protection over me that they would not consume me as I cast them out of the bed. Once I cast them out of the bed I prayed over my new futon bed and prayed that it was blessed and protected in Jesus name. As I sat back down to keep writing I had to stop again and bind and cast them out of my room as well and then God gave me a vision of protection over my body, my bed, and my room. I prayed one more prayer to bind and cast out any more demons left in the room and then I could feel them outside trying to get in they were so angry that the power of Jesus left them homeless and powerless in this place. Praise God! He is so good!
I did something slightly more crazy with my wedding rings; I flushed them down the toilet! I was praying over them asking God what to do with them and as I began to ask Him if I should sell them or give them away or have them melted down and sold that way?? He told me that anything that came from those rings would only bring destruction and nothing good could come from them, if I had them melted down they could end up in several pieces of other jewelry and curse even more people. I couldn't allow anyone else to be cursed by my past, God gave me a vision of water but since I don't live close to any water the thought occurred to me to just flush them down the toilet where no one would ever find them. I took them into my bathroom and continued to pray while holding them over my toilet and asked God to allow me to let go of them if it was His will. The Holy Spirit moved in me and released them into the toilet I felt freed and shook from the Holy Spirit's power. I flushed them down and God gave me the revelation that the water was symbolic of baptism, of my sins literally being washed away. How amazing is God?!?!
Thank you Lord for your goodness and mercy, thank you for being so forgiving and always having my best interests at heart even when it doesn't feel like it I know you ALWAYS have good intentions for me.
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